Afterthoughts - Pangs - Version Two
by Goddess Isa
Summary: Buffy comes home from LA a complete mess


TITLE: Afterthoughts - Pangs Version Two  
AUTHOR: Goddess Isa   
EMAIL: goddessisa@aol.com  
SUMMARY: Buffy comes home from LA a complete mess  
SPOILER: Pangs & sort of IWRY  
DISTRIBUTION: my site - http://planetslaythis.homestead.com - Anyone else, sure, just email me & lmk where it's going - I like seeing my name in print =)  
FEEDBACK: Please, I'd hate to have to Slay for it. =P  
RATING: TV-14   
DISCLAIMER: Sunnydale people = Joss. Insane and VERY tired = Isa   
  
  
  
"Buffy," Giles said when he opened the door. "I didn't realize you'd returned from LA."   
  
"I'm home." she entered and set her purse on his kitchen table.   
  
"How did you find your father?"   
  
"Out of town with his latest girlfriend." she leaned against the back of the couch, watching his reaction. "I guess family isn't the most important thing in his life. I guess I should've realized that after my last birthday."   
  
"I'm sorry, Buffy."   
"Me too."   
  
"So, will you be returning to the dorm now? I'm sure Willow's eager to talk to you."   
  
"No, I don't feel like it right now."   
  
"Do you have homework?"   
  
"Nope."   
  
"No plans whatsoever?"   
  
"I thought I'd hang here with you. Why?"   
  
"Uh, because..."   
  
"Rupert?" a British voice asked from upstairs. "Did you find the ice cream?"   
  
"I should go." Buffy grabbed her bag.   
  
"Are you all right?" Giles asked.   
  
"No, not really."   
  
"Something I can help you with?"   
  
"It just seems like every time I need you, you're playing house with that girlfriend of yours. And I'm sure she's really nice, but--"   
  
"Buffy, finals are in a week. Perhaps you should be studying."   
  
"No, I should be in LA screwing with my boyfriend, but I guess that's out of the question."   
  
"Perhaps you and I should talk. Tomorrow?"   
  
"Tomorrow. Sure." she left without looking at him again. The tears didn't start coming down her cheeks until she was two feet from his doorstep.   
  
She let them fall as she walked aimlessly around the city. She didn't feel like going back to the dorms, there wasn't anyone to talk to at her house, and all of her friends were too caught up in their own lives to actually be concerned with her.   
  
She sighed and thought of Spike. She wondered where he was since he wasn't at Giles'. She wasn't about to ask around though.   
  
Instead she decided to go to the old ice cream parlor she and Angel used to go to after patrol. Despite the cool weather they were open. She ordered a large hot fudge sundae and sat in a booth by herself. The cheerful music of the parlor was driving her nuts but she ate anyway, every bit of it.   
  
She walked towards the mansion with her shoulder slumped and her heart at her feet. She was alone, upset, and alone. She sighed and when she turned on Crawford Street, she almost didn't let her feet walk towards the place where she'd spent so much time with Angel.   
  
God, she missed him. She couldn't believe how cold their visit in LA had been. She hadn't wanted it to be like that. It was supposed to be warm, friendly. They were supposed to hug and then he was supposed to say she looked beautiful.   
  
He'd tell her he missed her and she'd cry and confess that she could no longer live without him.   
  
The tears would flow down her cheeks and he'd hold her and tell her she could stay with him forever.   
  
"God," she said aloud, wiping her tears away, streaking mascara along her cheeks. "I am so pathetic. That wouldn't even happen in my dreams."   
  
She entered the abandoned building and took a deep breath. She could still smell his candles, still see his face standing by the fireplace.   
  
A few of his books remained scattered on the floor. She picked them up, touching them romantically before putting them in her bag. She entered his bedroom and was surprised to find his sheets still on his bed.   
  
She took off all her clothes and crawled in between them, enjoying the feel of the cool silk against her skin. She could remember lying there with him after patrolling, could still feel his lips on hers.   
  
The tears poured from her eyes now, soaking his pillow and making her breathing ragged. She cried for a long time, never once trying to stop. She needed this, had been craving it. It had been so long since she'd let herself cry over Angel, and now that she had given into the emotions, she couldn't stop.   
  
Hours later, she closed her eyes and drifted off to sleep, wishing she could have just one more day with him.  



End file.
